I'm very scared of Tsunami

Today’s two interactions with the opposite sex

1—
On the street
I noticed a girl, because she looked attractive
She saw me
We exchanged smiles
We passed each other without a word

2—
In a shop
I talked to a girl, because she looked attractive
She was open
We had a chat for a while
We’ll surely meet again

---

Now, at night

I am remembering these two interactions

Apparently,
memory from the girl in the shop is far more vivid, tasteful & probably “meaningful”

I know her name
I know where she's from
I even know a slightly darker side of her

I was & still am pleased to meet her

However
a certain sadness is felt within me

Sadness of
memory from the girl on the street feels
less sharp
less significant
& more behind than the shop girl

---

Both interactions
.......in other words, both women.......
gave me a sense of joy & excitement

They contributed to my today's happiness

In this way,
the weight of both interactions should be equal

But
in my memory,
in my reminiscence,
in my dream,
the shop girl seems to carry more, far more, weight

And it should be

Because
we shared 15 min of our lives, while only 1 seconds with the other

Nothing goes against our intuition

except for a slight sadness inside me

---

Probably this could be explained like this;

Shop girl brought "a big" excitement into my life

that will likely repeat itself when I meet her again

On the other hand,
street girl brought a tiny, momentary, quiet joy into my life

Subtle, ephemeral & slightly warmer kind of happiness

that never repeats
that leaves nothing behind
that we forget very soon

---

..........These days I want to keep the surface of my emotional lake as flat as possible. Big emotional waves prevents me from noticing & appreciating "small happiness" in daily life. What I am scared the most is apparently, Tsunami