by axxxm
20/April/2025 in Tokyo
The other day
I visited my parents
They have a tree where butterflies lay their eggs
And around this season,
I see newly-born butterflies
And often,
they are deformed
Approximately 50% of them have some kind of “difficulty”—
— they can’t fly, and die soon
At night
Underneath my parents’ car
I saw a butterfly that had just become an adult
But
this one also seemed to have a problem with its wings
and unable to fly
For a moment, I wondered
why I had stopped here, instead of just walking toward the door and going inside the house
For a moment, I wondered
what this “sadness” was, rising within me
"..........I have nothing to do with this butterfly......this mere insect"
"..........this wasn’t one I took care of or waited to become a beautiful butterfly. It just suddenly appeared in my path, and my eyes 'mistakenly' caught this small insect"
"..........there’s no reason I should feel any attachment to this existence"
"but..........there is something very acute, very natural in the sadness I'm feeling now"
Perhaps
this is what is called "sympathy"
Even such a tiny, mere insect also has a soul and tries to live
just like humans
just like myself
"He" and "I" are both living existence
We are both under the same condition;
Born once — Die once
One life — One Death
An ephemeral life
Fundamentally, we are from the same place
And we are heading toward the same place too
........I wanted to give him something to eat
He was probably born last summer,
spent autumn & winter in a cocoon,
And now in spring,
he had finally become a butterfly
So much time had passed to reach here—
—here, in the middle of the concrete, beneath a car
And before his death
I wanted him to eat something — something sweet
My mother had a jelly for insects
I placed it in front of him
It probably surprised him, and he began to walk, ignoring the jelly
I put it in front of him a couple more times,
but he kept ignoring it
It felt like
I took a glance of his "will"
It felt like
even such a tiny existence has its own will that deserved to be respected
Respect
from one ephemeral living existence
to another ephemeral living existence
..........Next day came
He was not there anymore