Most Vulnerable Moment

24/June/2023 in Tokyo

Most vulnerable moment of a day must be when we wake up

This is when our unconsciousness transfers to consciousness

This transition moment is like a vacuum of our mind
And anything.......any thoughts, any emotions, any memories.......can invade into this vacuum, into our mind, yet we can't resist it at all

Sometimes it feels pleasing
Sometimes it feels bitter

Even if this is something we don't want to remember, our mind is so unprotected, completely unarmed, and there's no way to fight against this invasion  


This morning

During this morning's "dangerous" momentarily vacuum, I remembered a girl I met several years ago in Amsterdam

22 yo, from Spain, Moroccan root, studying biology in uni in Amsterdam

What came into my mind was not her face, not her name, but her hand

After an image of her hand came, I remembered her name, then her face

She had a beautiful hand

I actually no longer remember how her hand looked like
I don't have visual information anymore
but do have emotional information

A fresh sensation, that occurred when I noticed a beauty of her hand, still steadily remains in my mind

Does it have any meaning to my current life?

Does it push me to contact her, like "Hello! This morning I remembered your beautiful hand and you! How is it going!?"

Obviously, not at all

But something I still wonder is her reaction

If I had said "You have a beautiful hand" in front of her several years ago, how she would've reacted......how she was flattered & how she smiled at me with a slight embarrassment?